Ever try to figure out the best sexual positions? One of the most common mistakes guys make is equating knowledge of sexual positions with learning how to be her best lover. Sex is a lot more psychological than it is physical. If you are thinking about angles, your sexual positions will always feel mechanical, but, if you think in terms of the right state of mind, you’ll find yourself trying normal sexual positions in ways that feel incredible for the woman. It’s easier than you think. Here are some key principles surrounding your choice of a sexual position.
Strength and dominance
Strength and dominance are two traits that women find irresistible in the bedroom. It displays an attractive controlling attitude over the situation. You know what you like and how to give her pleasure, so lead her there. She’s waiting for you to initiate new positions, so why not surprise her with a sexual position that she loves. Because men are in the position of thrusting, they are the ones that naturally lead sex. To expect otherwise can ruin her mood when she’s expecting you to choose the position that works the best for you.
Ways of doing this include:
Pinning her down with your weight. She loves to feel you on top of her and not being able to move. This activates something primal in her that turns her into a sex-fiend.
Pinning her arms down also shows this same attractive dominance, and she’ll love pretending to try getting out from under your grasp. Keep in mind, this requires a certain level of comfort and trust from her so use your good judgment to decide when you want to try this.
Tell her what you want and don’t ask for permission. Nothing will kill her mood faster than a guy who is asking for permission to do anything. If you start doing anything she’s uncomfortable with, she’ll tell you. Lead slowly so she sees that, while you are taking control, you are respecting her and making sure she feels comfortable.
Contribute equal or more effort
Nothing is worse than having sex with someone who just lies down like a dead fish, so don’t expect her to do all the work. When you put her pleasure first she’ll want to reciprocate and show you that she can match your pleasure-giving skills. The meeting of two great lovers can turn into a challenge where each of you tries to give the other the most pleasure. This is a game where everyone wins.
More effort does not mean doing things harder. This is a common mistake men make after seeing numerous pornographic movies where the male lead tries ridiculous positions while thrusting like a jackhammer. Don’t imitate porn. More effort does not mean pounding as hard as you can, but, rather, paying more attention to what pleasures her.
Ways of doing this include:
-going down on her
-adding more foreplay
-waiting till she orgasms first
Variety of mood is better than variety of positions
Don’t mistake complex sex with pleasurable sex. You want sex to alternate between loving sex, sensual passionate sex, and primal sweaty sex. You don’t have to change much about the position you are in to alternate among these different ways of lovemaking. Varying the speed, the way you thrust, how much eye contact you make or the type of kissing you do can dramatically change the character of the sex. By moving her or your legs, you can change the angle at which the two of you meet, making for a very different experience while doing relatively little to change positions.
Other ways of accomplishing this are:
-Changing the tone of your voice and the things you say. There are many different kinds of lovers. Some talk dirty, others speak sweetly sweet, and still others are strong and silent. If you can alternate between these, she’ll feel like she’s had sex with someone who can meet all her needs. She wants a dirty speaking lover, a sweet one, and a strong, silent one, but only you can be all of those for her in one session of sex.
So remember that the best way to spark up the bedroom magic is to use these tips. As you pay more attention to her needs and gain more experience, you’ll quickly become the best lover she’s ever had.